Showing posts with label Tough Moments. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Tough Moments. Show all posts

Sunday, January 16, 2011

It is like i am having a period or something......and i am a GUY!!!....This is NOT normal

No offense to the ladies of course. I couldn't find another analogy so this has to do, sorry if it seems out of place,  the feelings i have been going through lately, seem equivalent to feelings that girls experience during that time of month, well just the sadness, depression and mood swings, of course i am not leaking anything. Before i proceed any further, let me say what i am going to write next is pretty embarrassing to admit for me cause its very girly and i feel my manhood violated writing this which is why i may delete it later.

So in my previous entry i mentioned quitting my own team, well the recent update is that i took over it again and my best bud left instead, breaking all forms of contact and just being a bitch towards me. Its over between us, which is what is saddening me at the moment.

I mean GOD DAMN IT, we were friends for a DECADE  and not just friends, best fucking buds, we laughed at same jokes, we would share the stories of  how we met a girl at some location or how to approach certain girl that i/him is interested in, how i witnessed a 59 year old hooker's spicy argument with her customer, or that he knows his classmate girl's underwear pattern (it was full of hearts).....and so many other millions things...

So it fuckin hurts man, and even though i am a guy, its RIGHT to feel sad for breaking up with a best bud right ?. I don't know how long my sadness will continue, for the record i have NOT cried, what the fuck why would you even think like that, i am NOT a girl. Just being depressed as a guy is fine though and im depressed because my bud ended our friendship.

I just watched a video i made for him ages back and it reminded me of him and i am feeling sad now. And i feel pissed as well, so i do things to piss him off, but then i feel sad and the cycle continues, which is why i said i feel like a girl. All my life, i associated these sort of cycle of emotions (rightfully) with girls, they be crazy...and i know how to make them act sane but i can't control myself even though i know how.

I know i am going to repeat over the same thing again and again which is honestly what the above paragraphs are, "i feel sad" x 100 times, but I AM FEELING SAD, so i don't care what this post may look like ultimately.

I miss you bitch, if you're reading this, then here you got a confession from me.

END OF THIS GIRLY POST.

/me MANS UP

I am out and promise will try to NOT post such emotional posts anymore!. BUT i am going through tough times now so.............i am SADDDDDDDDDD


PS: If you find any mistakes or generally find this post weird, its cause i didn't even decide to look back and edit it 10000 times like i usually do with my every post. I just burst my emotions and yeah thats how i do it, scolding myself and then be sad and then scolding andn  ddsahdjsdkajdsldsdhdjlsdasdsad


PS2: My next entry is going to be "Girls have it easy..." i feel like advertising! 


PS3: If you want to make me feel better, you can do so by commenting, visiting my site, or if your a girl, just msn stalking me, no dates i am a mess now!.


PS4: yes i will continue making a lot of PSsssss 


PS5: OMG check this out, Dakota Fanning Period BLOOD!  The post finally ends on something interesting for ya!!
I am half-curious what is that ?? and if its just a publicity-stunt ?
well she grabbed my attention so w00tt 

PS45443: I am still SADDD :(

Wednesday, January 5, 2011

Never do business with your best friend!....or any friend at all

NEVER do business with your friends or someone close to you

Because you will regret it and things will get worse and all you will have to deal with is a broken friendship and lots of disappointment. I guess i should have listened to this, my favorite actor in a movie said so even lol. Ah well, i am an ass for thinking otherwise, all i have left now is a blog entry.

It all started out few years back, you all know i am a coder and reverse engineer, so i started out a team and my this friend -- lets just call him Kem -- joined in with me. I said cool because he is my best friend and what can be better than having a best friend join in. It can only mean good things.....only if i knew.

Fast forward years later to now or the past few months, the team that i started has grown up and its doing amazing. It is among the top groups and competing with other groups in the business. Let me draw a graph to show you where it stands in comparison to other groups in business.
contrary to what many think, no blood was used to draw
 the red color in the above sketch


So as obvious from the above helpful sketch, the team was in position to gain nation-wide fame and i could be sitting next to an old fart giving interview on CNN/BBC about how it all started. But what happened instead was, i started to realize, i don't have power over my own fucking team for fuck's sake!. Let me elaborate.

I wanted to put advertisements on the site because it makes it look professional and i needed some revenue to help raise my kids, buy gifts for my girlfriend -- nope, nothing like what hillary duff got but close, and start a cookie factory because i love cookies!. But nay, Kem thinks its a bad idea and in a fight discloses the content of his mind. Before i go ahead, let me just say, this was our 2nd fight in the whole decade!. 

So in the fight, besides bashing my idea of ads, he goes on and criticize or rather bash my decision of kicking a member out because i thought he was an asshole from hell and deserved to stay there. Guys, a fight with strangers is cool but with best friend of a decade is not, it hurts and it sucks. So suffice to say, we got cool again but it was no fun like the old times. I still couldn't do what i wanted(ads) so what do i do ?.

I leave my own team, i don't know if you can call it stupid or what, leaving my own team but i thought this is the best decision for the team. Because i am an ass like that and i care about a stupid team and the people who joined me. And because if i kick my best friend and then do whatever i want with the team, that would end my friendship with him. So after 4 years of giving all my time and efforts to a team and bringing it to a point where its ready to bring fruition and rain revenue and money, i have to leave it to salvage a friendship because friendship is more important to me than my team. It sucks, a lot, to be honest!, i fucking feel sad and bad about leaving it but i had to, it was inevitable. Either of us had to, so i volunteered. Call me stupid, i won't mind.

Lets me head back and analyze how things could have been different. I start my own team, i give my friend position as a member instead of partner, things continue, today i could do whatever i want with it without any harm to the friendship. I think this article i just read, best explains it. Its a genius. Never mix social norms with market norms or you'll be blogging like me now instead of being on an awesome TV show.

Let me end this post on a positive note though, by giving you information about the team i founded and some of the stuff i did for it. To start off, the team name was (i am referring to it as "was" even though it exists because its not my team anymore) dEViATED - Clicky to go there. What its about is, it is a hacking team that hacks or trains games and build programs called Trainers. Basically making the game do whatever the team or the game-hacker wants it to do and the programs are programmed with such options. E.g a trainer with infinite health will give you infinite health in the game. Most of the times, these trainers comes with cool animations the team call demos/intros and sometimes their own mini-game environment (actually i am the revolutionizer and the first guy to do it ). So its a mini culture kind of thing with their own terms and rules. It requires skills but once you get in and get the hang of it, its pretty cool and not to mention, business worthy.

Let me show some of my work i did. This is probably going to be my only entry about such nerdy stuff because i suppose its boring for most of you unless you are into games and such things or a teenager. So here comes my awesome creation and proof that i can code and program.
^To a naked human eye the above program appears simple but
you'd need a microscope to realize the delicacy and lines of code
required to code such a program! 

And, my another and last program screenshot you will ever see, where i bring my awesomeness as usual. Seeing these program would make you realize i am a closet-nerd-cum-social-extrovert who loves to party when its the time and invent crazy software just like a mad scientist!.

Who would have ever guessed those clouds in the picture above would
have been the reason the whole England, Germany and New York is buried
under snow!. Who would have ? They look so innocent yet they aren't!

So lets me repeat the number 1 rule of business and recall what my fav actor said in my favorite movie so i'd never do such mistake again...

Never do business with your friends! 

What if the friend is a female ? What then ?. I have no idea, i guess its okay then ? Maria what do you think, i think my next business partner is going to be Maria because this rule doesn't apply when the partner is female....right ?

Right ?


PS: You could control Mario and let him run till he tired and jumps out of the screen to scream STOP!. If anyone is interested, i could provide the executables. But maybe i would not because...because i don't know. Stop asking so many questions.