Perfect GiRLFRiEND - I wish my girlfriend was like this

Is there such thing as a “Perfect Girlfriend” probably not but there are 10 traits we would love to see our women come equipped with. The chances of your girl to be 10 of 10 is pretty much a fantasy but I assume there are 1 or 2 out there amongst the 4 billion women roaming planet Earth.

1. Loves Sports

Even if she is one of those awful girls who act like a super fan as soon as a team gets good. I will take that in order to be able to talk sports and go to games with her, there’s nothing more guys love than sports and babes.

2. Has A Pretty Face

Yes a pretty face, not a club girl face with caked on make up and duck lips, that kind of face crashes and burns after 25 years old. Pretty faces last forever.

3. Has An Awesome Body

We don’t need you to have a 6 pack and 1% body fat, but as long as you are fit and care somewhat about your bod we are happy.

4. Loves To Cook

Even if the only thing she can cook is grilled cheeses that’s cool. Men love grilled cheeses so we would be happy with a fresh grilled chee every night, as long as you cook them naked from time to time as well.

5. Loves Video Games

Video games rule, sorry women but we are going to play them until we are 90 arguing with 8 year old nerds and calling them newbs. So if you can get a girl that will play an xbox game online with you from time to time you know you got a keeper.

6. Loves To Drink

We don’t want a Frank the Tank type drinker, but we want a girl who is excited to go out on the weekends and get a little typsy with us. A girl who thinks she is too mature to go out and get drunk with her boyfriend and friends is just plain lame.

7. Loves To Party

This goes hand and hand with drinking but more so towards just wanting to go out and have fun. Go to concerts, trips, whatever is fun and let’s us party through out the night with our chick.

8. Loves To Share

This is pretty much just a one in a million fantasy that every man has, yea it probably won’t happen but it would be cool if you bring home a girl for some triple play action.

9. Respects Time Out With Guy Friends

Sometimes girls just don’t understand why we want to go out with the guys. It is nothing against the girl, guys just need to be able to have a night every now and then to talk like animals, drink like wolves, and make fun of eachother, that’s what we do.

10. Loves Me For Me

I’m no Fabio, I pretty much look like the guy above. Guys aren’t the most pleasant thing to look at, so women don’t try to change your man, he is what he is. Changing him to fit your perfect vision is only going to last for a short while until it blows up in your face.

BONUS: Write notes likes this to us every now and then

It is like i am having a period or something......and i am a GUY!!!....This is NOT normal

No offense to the ladies of course. I couldn't find another analogy so this has to do, sorry if it seems out of place,  the feelings i have been going through lately, seem equivalent to feelings that girls experience during that time of month, well just the sadness, depression and mood swings, of course i am not leaking anything. Before i proceed any further, let me say what i am going to write next is pretty embarrassing to admit for me cause its very girly and i feel my manhood violated writing this which is why i may delete it later.

So in my previous entry i mentioned quitting my own team, well the recent update is that i took over it again and my best bud left instead, breaking all forms of contact and just being a bitch towards me. Its over between us, which is what is saddening me at the moment.

I mean GOD DAMN IT, we were friends for a DECADE  and not just friends, best fucking buds, we laughed at same jokes, we would share the stories of  how we met a girl at some location or how to approach certain girl that i/him is interested in, how i witnessed a 59 year old hooker's spicy argument with her customer, or that he knows his classmate girl's underwear pattern (it was full of hearts).....and so many other millions things...

So it fuckin hurts man, and even though i am a guy, its RIGHT to feel sad for breaking up with a best bud right ?. I don't know how long my sadness will continue, for the record i have NOT cried, what the fuck why would you even think like that, i am NOT a girl. Just being depressed as a guy is fine though and im depressed because my bud ended our friendship.

I just watched a video i made for him ages back and it reminded me of him and i am feeling sad now. And i feel pissed as well, so i do things to piss him off, but then i feel sad and the cycle continues, which is why i said i feel like a girl. All my life, i associated these sort of cycle of emotions (rightfully) with girls, they be crazy...and i know how to make them act sane but i can't control myself even though i know how.

I know i am going to repeat over the same thing again and again which is honestly what the above paragraphs are, "i feel sad" x 100 times, but I AM FEELING SAD, so i don't care what this post may look like ultimately.

I miss you bitch, if you're reading this, then here you got a confession from me.

END OF THIS GIRLY POST.

/me MANS UP

I am out and promise will try to NOT post such emotional posts anymore!. BUT i am going through tough times now so.............i am SADDDDDDDDDD


PS: If you find any mistakes or generally find this post weird, its cause i didn't even decide to look back and edit it 10000 times like i usually do with my every post. I just burst my emotions and yeah thats how i do it, scolding myself and then be sad and then scolding andn  ddsahdjsdkajdsldsdhdjlsdasdsad


PS2: My next entry is going to be "Girls have it easy..." i feel like advertising! 


PS3: If you want to make me feel better, you can do so by commenting, visiting my site, or if your a girl, just msn stalking me, no dates i am a mess now!.


PS4: yes i will continue making a lot of PSsssss 


PS5: OMG check this out, Dakota Fanning Period BLOOD!  The post finally ends on something interesting for ya!!

I am half-curious what is that ?? and if its just a publicity-stunt ?

well she grabbed my attention so w00tt 

PS45443: I am still SADDD :(

Never do business with your best friend!....or any friend at all

NEVER do business with your friends or someone close to you

Because you will regret it and things will get worse and all you will have to deal with is a broken friendship and lots of disappointment. I guess i should have listened to this, my favorite actor in a movie said so even lol. Ah well, i am an ass for thinking otherwise, all i have left now is a blog entry.

It all started out few years back, you all know i am a coder and reverse engineer, so i started out a team and my this friend -- lets just call him Kem -- joined in with me. I said cool because he is my best friend and what can be better than having a best friend join in. It can only mean good things.....only if i knew.

Fast forward years later to now or the past few months, the team that i started has grown up and its doing amazing. It is among the top groups and competing with other groups in the business. Let me draw a graph to show you where it stands in comparison to other groups in business.

contrary to what many think, no blood was used to draw

 the red color in the above sketch

So as obvious from the above helpful sketch, the team was in position to gain nation-wide fame and i could be sitting next to an old fart giving interview on CNN/BBC about how it all started. But what happened instead was, i started to realize, i don't have power over my own fucking team for fuck's sake!. Let me elaborate.

I wanted to put advertisements on the site because it makes it look professional and i needed some revenue to help raise my kids, buy gifts for my girlfriend -- nope, nothing like what hillary duff got but close, and start a cookie factory because i love cookies!. But nay, Kem thinks its a bad idea and in a fight discloses the content of his mind. Before i go ahead, let me just say, this was our 2nd fight in the whole decade!. 

So in the fight, besides bashing my idea of ads, he goes on and criticize or rather bash my decision of kicking a member out because i thought he was an asshole from hell and deserved to stay there. Guys, a fight with strangers is cool but with best friend of a decade is not, it hurts and it sucks. So suffice to say, we got cool again but it was no fun like the old times. I still couldn't do what i wanted(ads) so what do i do ?.

I leave my own team, i don't know if you can call it stupid or what, leaving my own team but i thought this is the best decision for the team. Because i am an ass like that and i care about a stupid team and the people who joined me. And because if i kick my best friend and then do whatever i want with the team, that would end my friendship with him. So after 4 years of giving all my time and efforts to a team and bringing it to a point where its ready to bring fruition and rain revenue and money, i have to leave it to salvage a friendship because friendship is more important to me than my team. It sucks, a lot, to be honest!, i fucking feel sad and bad about leaving it but i had to, it was inevitable. Either of us had to, so i volunteered. Call me stupid, i won't mind.

Lets me head back and analyze how things could have been different. I start my own team, i give my friend position as a member instead of partner, things continue, today i could do whatever i want with it without any harm to the friendship. I think this article i just read, best explains it. Its a genius. Never mix social norms with market norms or you'll be blogging like me now instead of being on an awesome TV show.

Let me end this post on a positive note though, by giving you information about the team i founded and some of the stuff i did for it. To start off, the team name was (i am referring to it as "was" even though it exists because its not my team anymore) dEViATED - Clicky to go there. What its about is, it is a hacking team that hacks or trains games and build programs called Trainers. Basically making the game do whatever the team or the game-hacker wants it to do and the programs are programmed with such options. E.g a trainer with infinite health will give you infinite health in the game. Most of the times, these trainers comes with cool animations the team call demos/intros and sometimes their own mini-game environment (actually i am the revolutionizer and the first guy to do it ). So its a mini culture kind of thing with their own terms and rules. It requires skills but once you get in and get the hang of it, its pretty cool and not to mention, business worthy.

Let me show some of my work i did. This is probably going to be my only entry about such nerdy stuff because i suppose its boring for most of you unless you are into games and such things or a teenager. So here comes my awesome creation and proof that i can code and program.

^To a naked human eye the above program appears simple but

you'd need a microscope to realize the delicacy and lines of code

required to code such a program! 

And, my another and last program screenshot you will ever see, where i bring my awesomeness as usual. Seeing these program would make you realize i am a closet-nerd-cum-social-extrovert who loves to party when its the time and invent crazy software just like a mad scientist!.

Who would have ever guessed those clouds in the picture above would

have been the reason the whole England, Germany and New York is buried
under snow!. Who would have ? They look so innocent yet they aren't!

So lets me repeat the number 1 rule of business and recall what my fav actor said in my favorite movie so i'd never do such mistake again...

Never do business with your friends! 

What if the friend is a female ? What then ?. I have no idea, i guess its okay then ? Maria what do you think, i think my next business partner is going to be Maria because this rule doesn't apply when the partner is female....right ?

Right ?


PS: You could control Mario and let him run till he tired and jumps out of the screen to scream STOP!. If anyone is interested, i could provide the executables. But maybe i would not because...because i don't know. Stop asking so many questions.

2 thousand and eleven or 2011....Yes the year you will get dumped...!

Okay, so apparently everyone and their mother has been blogging about the new year and merrymaking and wishing happy joy for the coming year. Its cool alright, but come on, didn't we do it the year that passed ?, it gets boring and lets be honest how many times the resolutions we make actually make it to reality.


I hate being boring and being consistent and predictive, it is for this reason, this post isn't your usual happy new year post, okay it is but it is a lot more than that. In that, i'll give you the rundown of what i did on the night everyone was waiting anxiously for the 0 to turn to 1 (how nerdy!) and what happened to me the whole year, because OMG it was some awesome shit and i bet my year has been a lot interesting than most of you...

To start, I received comments from a girl that said (her words exactly!)

You are narcissistic to the point that if you could, you would turn yourself into a girl and marry yourself!...

You mean a Hermaphrodite ? I am not too sure i'd want to become that but yes, i'd definitely marry myself because i honestly don't mind alone time and love hanging out with myself and am happy as a cow (or is it happy as donkey or a duck ? ) Still, i let girls enjoy my awesome company, because i am ironically also self-less like that and not selfish at all!. In fact i am so self-less, on any given night or day, i am surrounded by them and i let them have a piece of me, i lost 15 pounds already!. Blog entry coming soon about that.

^That comment was received just hours ago so that makes my first compliment received for the year 2011!.

Continuing on, I made my first new year resolution about doing Firsts!. I got my first blog follower, greets to that awesome lady for being my first follower!. I completed that resolution i made within hours of making it. That just adds awesome points.

I got myself involved in my first car accident in 2010 and of course i survived although i lost 584 brain cells. Yes i know that much because i have 1000 cells total and if i had lost anything more than that, i would have been blogging.....wait i am blogging....shit lets not make it anymore confusing. The accident wasn't pleasant, not at a all and a pretty bad experience so thats a little sad moment there :(.

I made a friend in the most weird of ways, by trying to be awkward around a complete stranger (just for fun), turns out the more i tried to be awkward the more we started to get along well. Now he is my new friend and loves my taste in women (seriously, i have no idea if i should be happy about it).

I won a programming contest and hit on a programmer girl in the event. She was total cutie but unfortunately no phone exchanges as it was a programming contest and we had a bitchy organizer there who didn't look pleased with our little small talk. I guess that makes my list of Firsts as well. A programmer girl i First hit on. Oh she made some sort of facial recognition program so that was totally cool!. Yes, i'd be in touch with her once i get a chance to go there again.

So this past year, i approached a girl that i think was my first 10, i almost got my ass busted....because of a girl, i got my ass kicked by a girl's boyfriend, i ran like a crazy after a girl who was an athlete, i saved two damsels in distress...wait that was 2 years back, i hit on hot Nurses (wtf you ask ?), i got surrounded by a group of 5 girls all wanting a piece of me, i smoked cigs, i didn't do cocaine - never will, i took a ride in a Mercedes-Benz!, i posted on other blogs, i got in a fight with a commentator on another blog, i started my own blog then i ate, i slept, i farted and blogged about it .....

So you see i did a lot of things this year because people do a lot of things and i am people...right ?. I plan to do a lot of things next year, one of which includes coming out of this screen and

 

punching you in the face

because i love you!. Did you know turtles can fart ?

So Happy New Year everyone, i hope in this new year, each one of you get single so i can date as many of your exes as i can, because...well i don't know why i would want to date your ex. You see i don't know about a lot of things so

Happy New Year bitches!  :-D


PS: How was your year ?

PS2: The title is completely random so don't worry, i am NOT predicting anything, although it may be true! 

My Firsts - Things i'll never forget for the rest of my life!

So i just watched this movie "Mini's Firsts" i wouldn't recommend it because its not really awesomeness but rather okay. However, if you are Nikki Reed fan, you must watch this, she looks hot, total bombshell in this movie, you just can't miss it out. I also, just realized she is almost the same age as me, having born in the same year i am which is pretty cool, which makes this post even more special.

So as i was saying, this movie may not be that good but the idea was awesomeness!. Basically in the movie, Mini(Nikki) has this list of things she has done for the first time in her life and calls them "Firsts". She continuously expands the list by doing new kind of adventurous and daring things for the first time, such as becoming an escort and other crazy things. Way to enjoy life!.

So being a fan of Nikki, and in dedication to this movie, i am compiling my own list of Firsts and making a resolution to expand this list with most daring, bizarre and generally awesome things. Actually, i just made my first resolution, my First New Year Resolution!, as strange as that may sound, i never made any new year resolution because well i knew i wouldn't make them happen but my first resolution, its going to happen. So my list...

Steyny's Firsts

First Approach:  I approached a perfect hottie back in Nov 09, a certified 10 and apart from a little sweating and running away after striking a conversation, i did good. That makes me awesome from billion losers who still can't approach the girl they eye for their whole life, have her photos walled next to the toilet seat and creeping her out by drolling and eyeing her like i do a pizza that i am just about to eat or from guys that do approach but with most creepiest openers. She liked me and she probably would've been my first girlfriend if i hadn't had a nervous breakdown.

First Girlfriend: Okay i have to admit, not trophy worthy this First, but if i had known i'd start a list of Firsts, she wouldn't have been my girlfriend, not my First at least. Not much to say here, she was young and cool but not cool enough to deserve a first sadly.

First Time Smoking: I remember, when i had my first cigarette, i said "WHAT ? is this why people smoke, this is bullshit and they said smoking is addicting". I felt nothing so i smoked another, nothing, and another till i blew the whole pack and it was then that i started to get my first high. That was awesomeness!. It didn't last long though, barely just for an hour because i went to sleep!. That was it actually, i never got high again no matter how much packs i blew and i realized cigarettes don't addict me or get me high, then i started crack cocaine and stuff like that. No, Of course i am kidding about crack, No matter how enticing that offer is and no matter how much my friends try to convince me, drugs won't make my Firsts. I quit smoking with rather ease, i got good genes, so it didn't addict me. So all girls who want to date me and are disgusted with cigs, don't worry that is history. I haven't smoked for almost a year now!. Although i'd start again if theres a hottie that does it, just to company her...really.

The list is pretty long but thats all that i could think of right now and interesting of em. Now, here's a list of Firsts i would like to make...

• Getting slapped by a girl after i tell her to stick her tongue out and then kissing it!. Awesomeness.
• Skydiving or Bungee jumping or any of adrenaline rushing activity of similar intensity
• Anal Sex  <-Select the text if you want to read but i warn you, some of you may not be quite fond of it and may be disgusted!. Its in guys genes and every guy dreams of it so don't just blame me, i want to do it after taking all necessary steps.
• Dating my first fatty, just for the fun of it.

This idea of First is awesome for the fact it inspires to start living the life in a more fun way and making the most of it, after all we get it only once, and it especially would motivate some of the timid ones to be adventurous. Not to mention the nostalgic aspect that comes with it when you make historically awesome Firsts.

So what are your Firsts ?...


PS: This movie makes my favorite of all time even though i don't think high of it and Nikki Reed gets my love for starring in it and damn shes so hot!

PS2: I would work to make her my first celebrity bang!. Wish me luck for it are a tough task. 

PS3: Yes i am alive, sorry for the long break and not blogging. Had a lot of stuff happening lately so couldn't get the time.

Being alone...how do you pass your time ?

So how do you pass your time when you're alone ?. The best way obviously (or for me) is to go out, call friends and chill or hang out with my girlfriend and do stupid things or meet new people (especially girls) or anything that involves socializing or just going out. BUT what if you're sick and forced to sit or lay on bed all day ? and your friends are out enjoying at a pub  and your girlfriend is crying for you along with her friends at another pub so they can't come.

Well then you have to do one of these things.

Get a few movies of different genres and watch them one by one. The genres should include

• Horror/Supernatural thrillers and Zombie movies: Such as Zombieland , Resident Evil: Afterlife , Nightmare on Elm Street , Devil , Afterlife.
• Romantic/Comedy movies: To ease the tension, such as Forgetting Sarah Marshall , Get Him to the Greek , The 40-Year-Old Virgin , He's Just Not That into You (chick-flick so uhmm...).
• Others: Bitch Slap , Fast & Furious series! , The Social Network , Hardwired , xXx (No, not what you think, its a movie of Vin Diesel) , Taken.

 and watch them alternating between each genre so you don't get bored. That should be enough to pass enough time to get recovered.

Or if NOT, then this will do. Grab your favorite music and start reading blogs and browsing forums. For me it has to be anything by Lady Gaga , Linkin Park or rock music.

Blogs can be pretty interesting, i'd recommend those of my followers ;) and dating blogs, they're fun. Tucker Max is another fun place. Stay away from moma blogs which most of the internet is filled with unless you want to have kids and want to parent, they definitely aren't for you. These blogs will seriously make you sick of the idea of having a blog (with the exception of few ofcourse!).....i warned you!.

You can also do the NERDy fun things and code a sick program and be a billionaire like Mark Zuckerberg by coding such cool thing as Facebook but i doubt that, you probably lack the IQ to do that (no offense) so i wouldn't recommend it.

Or if you don't have the luxury of a computer or a laptop! then grab hold of your cellphone or PDA and start doing the above things, movies, music or playing games. This is why you should keep fun stuff on your PDA all times for emergency cases. You can also take revenge on your friends for not coming and bombard their phones with messages, calling them. Or you can take naked pictures of yourself and facebook them to gain international fame (doesn't work if your a guy), of course i wouldn't recommend this!. Another fun thing is prank calls, they're pretty FUN!.

OR lets suppose, you don't have a cellphone or any kind of mobile device either (oh boy!) then well i am kinda out of options, give me a few mins.

Okay back, you can then do the following and its the best thing. If you are religious then nothing beats the calmness and peaceful feelings you get by praying, it is actually a better option than all of the above and it has the added benefit of speeding up your healing process. I'd recommend it even if you have the above options available, nothing beats it!.

You can also do what fatties love to do, EAT!.  Yes you fat bustard, you hear me right, eat like there's no day tommorow, it only helps with speeding up healing process as your body needs extra calories and nutrients to fight off germs and repair. Warning: Stay away from fatty foods, that doesn't help!.

This is also actually a good time to get a pen and paper and write what you want to do with your life, write resolutions and commitments to change your lifestyle to a better one.

So its actually not that hard to pass time when you are alone with just you, after all the best person in the world is our own self of course and a little alone time is not bad.

This entry is brought to you thanks to my disease that leaves me alone in room and not able to go out and i wondered how best could i pass my time with lack of all things social and i came with the above ideas. If you have other ideas, share please, i would love to listen!.



PS: Some other not so recommended things that you can do:  Smoke cigarettes, hookah or drugs, kill cockroaches and bugs, play with bugs, walked naked in the house, call a stripper , make a video-tape and suicide.

PS2: ^I am kidding of course 

The Girl who...well i am sure was an athletic runner!

Courage is resistance to fear, mastery of fear — not absence of fear. -Mark Twain

So how do you be courageous and beat the fear of approach ? by approaching and approaching in the most goofyish way. This little story of mine goes back to the time when i was just starting out on the journey of being fearless, extremely confident and approaching strangers without pouring down sea of sweat and nervousness.

I was with my friend getting back to our villa(dorm) and i was mocking him how he has got so many guy friends but very few females, he must be gay. He said its different with girls, you can strike up a conversation with any guy and be friends in 5 mins but with girls, its a different story. So not true, its just your fear of rejection/approach....i told him, girls are way more receptive, i can strike up a convo with any girl you see on the street here. So this got us to betting if i approach a girl right then, he would owe me a pack of cigarettes of X brand(that brand was my fav when i used to smoke, if anybody want to know its name, shoot me a comment). Whats more enticing than a pack full of smoke ? Seriously... there's just no alternative so i agreed, lets do this shit.

Just as we agreed on the bet, i saw a (let me remember, checking files in my memory....k found) hot brunette with a body i imagine my girls to have, not too skinny(or anorexic), not too chubby, just the perfect balance and the white milky skin, ehmm perfect!. But hold on a sec....is she running ? almost running...she was walking but at a really fast pace and i mean like at REALLY fast pace.... check the map out

As we were turning towards st(reet).2, she was at the intersection and then at blink of eye, way far ahead than intersection. Damn, she had the fastest walking speed i've ever seen a girl have. So i decide on approaching her, my buddy as obvious thinks its a bad idea, i also think its a bad idea in my mind at least but still, the offer of pack of cigarettes and that milky white skin is too enticing to pass.

So i run, YES i run after her but shes way too fast, shes not even running, just walking wtf. Imagine that, i am running after her in the middle of street full of people staring at me, it definitely made me look like a stalker or something, only if i had a knife in hand, that would've made things a lot more interesting. I could hear my buddy laugh, at my inability to catch her despite running and probably at how funny the situation was....it wasn't for me, don't laugh you bustard. As i finally get near her, i shout

Me: "hey listen..."

she turns her head and looks at me....i am out of breath by now (sidenote: smoking really kills lungs cells and makes the stamina non-existent, i used to bodybuild but it can't help when you chain-smoke and run 1km after a girl)... She looks at me with those curious eyes, damn she had beautiful eyes with stars in it...

So i tell her: lets sex sweetie, she gets to the job immediately and we start loving eachother in the middle of street with 500 people and a dog watching us rip eachother clothes and.......the rest is history

Only if it was that easy in real life. I catch my breath quickly and tell her

Me: "hey you walk too fast...." (this was my opener ughh..)
Her: laughs...
Me: "i was just wondering where is X place"..i ask for directions (i didn't really needed to know but it works as icebreaker)

   .... meanwhile my friend just behind my back is whispering into me ears she's not really receptive and just rushing things...she hears this because well he was NOT really whispering...as the situation kinda gets creepy cause she hears what my bud 'whispered' into my ear...i speak....

Me: "this is not true what my friend says right ?" (i actually ask her that hahaa...lame)
Her: "nope" .. and then goes on explaining the directions (hahaa)

at this point, i could feel from her eyes she is assuring me that she is receptive and really wants to talk, i can't explain it really, it was body language or more precisely eye language...she wanted me to invest and talk more....but my friend is again whispering....it annoys me so i think of ejecting before shit hits the fan again...

Me: "alright thanks....you walk really fast though"
Her: laughs again and turns her head and resume her lightening speed.
Me: "oh and my friend is gay"....i shout at her back
She hears it and put her hands up giving a thumbs up hahaa.

Then i start kicking and punching my friend for being an asshole and get my pack of cigarettes at the next shop...i win!. I lose the girl though, she was really cool and had a sense of humor and a milky white skin...i love girls like that. And especially when you ask her stupid questions like that (are you receptive ?) and she still be cool about it, then im all hers.

I went on and approached some hot nurses later on, i may blog about it later but this approach was special. It completely crushed my fear because i was acting goofy (running like an ass in a street, asking her stupid questions). My friend still didn't change his mind and had fear of approaching, i am now sure he is gay.



PS: I figure the reason why she was running. 2 mins from where i approacher her, there is a medical complex, she entered there. I felt kind of bad then, maybe someone close to her was ill cause she was in serious rush. I made her day though...